I’ve been dumped for a guy

I’ve been dumped for the piano tuner.

I had a feeling this was going to happen.
She goes gaga every time Gary arrives to tune the piano.
But today was different. I couldn’t pry her away from his side.

Unfortunately, her zeal proved to be her undoing.
Like any woman trying to catch the eye of a musician,
she made the mistake of trying too hard to catch his attention.

She started playing with her squeaky toy, hoping that Gary would join in.
Turns out, it’s difficult to tune a piano while being accompanied by a squeaky toy.

She was banned from the living room.
She was not happy about being trapped upstairs with me.
I’m not as good looking as Gary.

I convinced her to follow me, but she clearly wanted to be elsewhere.

Eventually, she set up shop at the top of the stairs,
a furry Juliet separated from her Romeo.

I was hurt by her betrayal, so I went about my business.
A few minutes later, I had the feeling that something was amiss.

ESCAPE!!!!!!

Sure enough, she was right where I knew she’d be…

Darn dog! What about all the long walks I take for her benefit?
What about all the food I pour into her bowl? The belly scratches? The cute nicknames?

Worse, doesn’t she know that Gary owns CATS?!!!

His disinterest seemed to inflame her passions.
She couldn’t get enough of him, even though he barely looked her way.
Seized by an irrational spurt of jealousy, I did what any jilted lover would do…

I trapped her in my office and pretended that she wanted to be there with me.
She spent the whole time gazing longingly at the door.
My best friend dumps me for musicians.
Love is cruel.

Tagged as: dogs