The knot in my family tree – Win $35 Amazon Gift Card

by Lynn on November 2, 2011

Only a few of us have been thrown into jail.
Yep. My family tree contains some of us who wore stripes and lived in a cell.


So far, I’ve managed to avoid a trip to the slammer.
I’m routinely disorderly in private. I fear that someday, I’ll go public.


At first glance, we appear to be an educated lot. Classy. Erudite.
Family gatherings entail spirited discussions on Keynesian economics…
then they spiral out of control into gingerbread cake fights and burping contests.


But I guess we all have skeletons in our closets.
The rattling bones keep me up at night periodically.


Why do I bring up these sordid tales?
Because one of my sordid tales will be e-published in May, 2012.
It’s a romance between two people with plenty of skeletons in their closets.

.

To celebrate the impending release of my e-book, I’m hosting a giveaway each month.
Leave a comment, and you’ll be entered to win a $35 gift card from Amazon.com.
The winner will be randomly selected on Wednesday, November 9th, 2011.

Just answer this simple question:

Has your family ever embarrassed you in front of your date?

I’ll post some of your funny replies next Wednesday.

Kim @ Homesteader's Heart November 2, 2011 at 5:41 am

Oh my Dad used to do this one thing ALL THE TIME. When a boyfriend would call and ask for “Kim”, my dad would ALWAYS and I mean ALWAYS say, “Kim, who?” I would run to the phone in horror. LOL!
One time my brother purposely got his guns out and started cleaning them. When my date came to pick me up he saw the arsenal all over the table. I didn’t get touched the whole night. LOL!
Congrats on your upcoming e-book my friend. How fun!
Have a lovely day.
Kim

April November 2, 2011 at 7:05 am

My husband and I were very successful in embarrassing our daughter in front of her date. As a freshman in high school, she asked us to go to the prom with a senior boy. We didn’t trust him very much, but we reluctantly allowed her to go. Now my husband is an EMT and is close with most all of the officers in law enforcement in our small town, so he secretly called a few friends that he knew would be working security at the dance and gave them a heads up to watch out for our daughter and her date. Her date decided they should leave the dance early and go do ‘something else’…..as they left the gym, a deputy stopped them and said ” Where are you going? Your dad said you have either have to stay here or come straight home.” Hannah was so embarrassed she barely spoke to us for a week, but they stayed at the dance and she was home early! Success!! ☺

Carla November 2, 2011 at 7:10 am

What’s so bad about burping contests? I can’t claim any incarcerated progenitors, but the burping contests, yes, we got one. :-) My paternal grandfather passed away rather suddenly; I had to call my parents on their Canadian camping trip with my little sister (I was house sitting) to tell them. We all piled in the car and rode from NY to SC. My grandmother, known as Oma, was very upset, and for a woman who almost always was laughing, it was hard to see. We all got through the services, the funeral, etc., and being rather immature, my brother, my cousins and I found a six pack of Coke and took it to the covered porch to play cards and get away from all the sad people. My cousin Eric can be a little outrageous at times–one of the things I love most about him–and after a hearty swallow, he belched, loud and long. That inspired a burping contest including the alphabet, songs, poetry, TV quotes, you name it. We didn’t realize how much noise we were making until Oma came out to the porch to admonish us, but someone (I can’t recall who) had one last belch in him/her and it came out unexpectedly. Oma laughed again; she couldn’t resist. it was beautiful.

I mentioned that moment to a friend of mine, who used it in one of her books for a scene after a character’s beloved uncle passes. The moment has been immortalized with an ISBN number to go with it. :-)

Christopher Laevey November 2, 2011 at 7:36 am

I had my first ‘real’ date before I was old enough to drive legally. Fortunately, she was an older woman. A senior to my sophmore! At the end of the evening, I invited her inside. I warned her that my mother was ever so slightly off but if we were going to date she was going to have to get used to that.
As I opened the door, my mother comes bounding down the hallways saying “Oh good. You’ve brought my little Chrissy home safe and sound”.
I’m glad I prepared Laurie for that sort of greeting and that my mother and I share a distorted sense of humor otherwise that might have driven me to a monestary.

Jen November 2, 2011 at 8:34 am

My family embarrass me?

Not really because I am too busy embarrassing them.

Oklahoma Granny November 2, 2011 at 8:49 am

I’m really just commenting, not entering your contest since I won last month.

I just wanted to comment and say I thought it was somewhere in the “Laws of Parents” that they HAVE to embarass their kids at some point of their lives. It builds character you know. Bwahahahahaha!

PS. My kids, and now some of my grandkids, have built a lot of character if you know what I mean. :)

MaryAnn November 2, 2011 at 10:44 am

I don’t think my parents ever really embarrassed me too much around any of the guys I’ve dated. But they tried. I just don’t scare easy. And neither did any of the guys :-)

Thanks for the giveaway! And congrats on getting published – that is SO exciting!

Amanda P November 2, 2011 at 12:49 pm

My parents really never embarrassed me in front of dates. I think because they were just as nervous as the guy was.

Tammy November 2, 2011 at 2:15 pm

When I was 15 I went on a first date with the “Big Man on Campus”-star of the football team, Mr. Jock who was 17. When we got home, my father was skinning a deer on the back of his truck…dressed in full camo, blood up to his elbows, 12 inch skinning knife, the works. I introduced him to my date and he looks at him and says “Grab that leg, boy, and hold it tight.” And proceeds to continue skinning the deer with my date holding it’s leg. Nice.

Anna November 2, 2011 at 2:45 pm

My sister did embarrass me all the time. Once she pushed and locked me out of the house when only wearing underwear and my date was on his way to picking me up. Haha @April, your story is too funny!
Anna´s last blog post ..What is so controversial about root canal treatment?

Alexis@TroublesomeTots November 2, 2011 at 3:02 pm

I was so in love with Scott Fogel that I played the trombone for SIX YEARS so I could sit next to him (tuba of course) in band. Finally I got one, blissful date out of my tromboning investment. Only we stayed out 20 minutes past curfew and when he walked me to the door my Dad read me the riot act while Scott was standing next to me.

There never was a second date. I like to blame my Dad instead of accepting that my paralyzing nervousness was probably the issue ;)
Alexis@TroublesomeTots´s last blog post ..Baby Sleep: What is Normal?

Buggsby November 2, 2011 at 3:19 pm

Oooooh… I have a crazy family so there are plenty of stories. I will give you two….

There is always the classic “are you getting married”:
I am a younger child, and had nieces and nephews around for some of my dates. You can imagine how awkward it is when you are standing there next to a guy and a cute little kid pipes up and asks if the two of us are getting married. Yeah, I think that is enough said about that story.

Story # 2 happened between my two sisters.
My oldest sister’s boyfriend called and asked to speak to her. Sister#2, who answered the phone, asked to know who was calling, and he said guess. So she proceeded to guess… I think she got through 3 names before sister#1 came RUNNING for the phone and stopped the fiasco. (Needless to say, that relationship ended)

Dawn Nichols November 2, 2011 at 3:23 pm

My parents were great and thankfully never embarrassed me in front of dates. :) Thanks so much for the chance to win!

Jo H. November 2, 2011 at 4:08 pm

I didn’t date until I hit university so my parents never met my dates until they were firmly established as people of interest. And then they were very nice to them. I was lucky!

Donna Wensch November 2, 2011 at 5:00 pm

I had the best parents on earth. They were my best friends and respected me enough to not ever embarrass me. Lord, how I miss them. Thank you for the good memories.

Susanna November 2, 2011 at 5:02 pm

Mom and Dad haven’t embarrassed me directly in front of dates. However, my parents are pastors in the local church so they have plenty of opportunities to embarrass me in front of most everyone I know anyway! They hardly ever embarrass me. Now Mom and Dad are probably my best friends.

Stacey November 2, 2011 at 6:18 pm

The first time I brought a boy home from being away in college, my parents followed us around like hawks. We would go in the basement to watch a movie and about 5 minutes later they’d come in, saying they just wanted to read a book. Really? Read a book when the lights are off and a movie is on? Talk about obvious! Finally, my mom flat out said, “Is it going to be ok if we leave you guys alone in here?” I was mortified! I knew nothing was going to happen, and couldn’t believe she would say that! Luckily it didn’t scare that boy away because he’s now my husband!

HannahBee November 2, 2011 at 9:46 pm

I haven’t really had any dates yet, but when I do, my family is going to embarass the heck out of me.

Jill November 3, 2011 at 6:46 am

It’s basically which date at which time. It’s wild with my family! There are: the gross stories my mom the R.N. tells at dinner time (which we are used to… dates not so much…) ie: “So then I hand to manually stimulate his bowels digitally and that crap was ROCK HARD!”; Or the, “When bean was 3 years olld she got mad at her grandpa and peed all over his suit case in retaliation.”; or my mom, whom I lovingly reffer to as the 50-something yr old Jessica Simpson: She is bright and smart…. yet she gets very confused, very easily… I mean embarassingly easy. But as far as that last one goes, I actually like that about my mom now. But when I was 16, I wasn’t exactly thrilled when she made odd first impressions!
Jill´s last blog post ..Funny Things That Freak Kids Out

Lee-Ann November 3, 2011 at 8:26 am

Oh yes, my Dad use to talk about getting the guns out when the boyfriends were around and one time he chased my boyfriend down the street barefoot after the kid swore at him. LOL Oh, that time was bad!

wendy greenspan November 3, 2011 at 12:12 pm

NO, I guess i have been lucky in that department. I always feared that he would, though, as he used to embarass me and my sister just among ourselves. I made a vow to never do that to my daughters.

Kim Kelly November 3, 2011 at 4:42 pm

Yes, but it’s partly my fault. I started dating before I mustered the nerve to get a driver’s license.. My mom was ‘nice’ enough to drive me and my date to the theater and home.. When my date tried to kiss me goodnight in front of her car I tried to dodge him but he caught me right in her line of vision. Such teasing on that one. Ugh.

Cottage By The Sea November 3, 2011 at 10:05 pm

First, congratulations on your book! I can’t wait to read it.

My dad called my husband (boyfriend at the time) Jeff, for the first two years we were together. His name is actually Scott. What’s worse is that I never even dated a guy named Jeff. Embarrassing.

Hey, would ya tell that doll house doll, in your first picture, to quit tipping her chair – that’s my pet peeve!

I loved reading about everybody’s embarrassing moments. Can’t wait to read more!

Sandy November 4, 2011 at 1:22 pm

not on purpose…and sadly, there isn’t anything you can do about genetics!

Karen McDermott November 4, 2011 at 10:57 pm

When my boyfriends called after 10pm, my dad used to tell them I was “dead.” Alas, I’m still single today.

Beth Mosier November 7, 2011 at 9:37 am

Unfortunately no I might have gotten a little more respect. Daddy did show up in the oddest places though and their friends. At that time the village took watching out for each other very seriously.

Cheryl Barker November 8, 2011 at 10:35 am

My family knew how to embarrass me in front of my date, behind my date, beside my date, and just about anywhere you can imagine :)
Cheryl Barker´s last blog post ..A Lovely Reminder

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