I’m tired of men dueling over me.
Yesterday, two men dueled for my attention.
If I had a dollar for every time this happened,
I’d be blogging about how sunny it is in Hawaii right now.
It’s stressful watching a duel. I begged them to stop.
They didn’t hear my pleas over the clanging of their swords.
The neighbors began to complain about the noise.
That only served to escalate the tension, and the dueling continued.
It’s flattering when two knights try to impress you in this fashion.
However, some members of my family weren’t so impressed:
I endeavored to stop the duel by offering the knights cookies.
They wouldn’t stop unless I offered one of them a kiss.
“I can’t,” I said. “I’m already married.”
The fighting came to an abrupt halt.
One of the men challenged my husband to a duel.
Then my husband stepped on him.