As I gazed out of my palatial estate, I felt lonely.
No one else lived on my 1,000 acre estate.
It was just me tucked away in the woods.
A soft knock echoed through my castle.
I searched all 97 rooms and discovered the noise came from the front door.
I opened the heavy mahogany door inlaid with gold ingot.
A deer, a fox, and a squirrel stood on my front porch.
I invited them inside. I was desperate for company.
Even if the company included a deer.
I served them refreshments.
The deer declined. It had already eaten my entire garden.
The fox told witty jokes while it hid my silverware in it’s red coat.
The squirrel chattered incessantly and wouldn’t stop throwing nuts at me.
The meal was a bit…stressful.
I invited everyone to watch football in the living room.
The squirrel couldn’t sit still.
The fox curled up on the floor and fell asleep.
The deer kept laughing at the art hanging on my wall.
After they finally left, I retired to my bedroom.
I brushed my hair 100 times and thought about my lot in life.
I didn’t want to rub elbows with any more deer.
They’re bullies with no taste in art.
Time to move to the city.
Am I the only one who can’t stand deer?